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PW #364: Young Adult Contemporary Fantasy: OF SERPENTS AND STARS

Thursday, 2 November 2017  |  Posted by Brenda Drake

Manuscript Status: Finished

Mentor Name: Judi Lauren

Mentee Name: Alexandria Rogers


Category: Young Adult

Genre: Contemporary Fantasy

Word Count: 91,000 words


Dancing for the vile French Troll King’s masquerade balls is all seventeen-year-old Azea knows until Luc, a charismatic stranger, arrives with a secret: there’s a way to defeat the King. To free those who dance in chains, Azea must burn the remnants of her haunted past and embrace the part of herself she’s always feared, or risk losing Luc—and herself—forever.


Deep in the night, in nothing but gossamer silk and a mask of diamonds, I was simply a body. Hands twirling, hips swaying, chiffon careening around my calves.

Sweat, slick, heady, drunk, dancing, dancing, dancing.

Chandeliers dripping with crystallized moonlight glittered in the Court’s ballroom. It was so grand, so opulent, it could swallow me whole. I barely saw the far walls as I pirouetted across the gilded marble floor, my toes screaming with each impact.

Hundreds of girls moved alongside me, their faces concealed by the intricate masks we wore every night.

But I knew each and every one of them.

Their thoughts, their breaths, were real. We were real, a secret we kept to ourselves, because we were Les Dames Masquées of Trolleaux, the Troll Court just south of Paris. Forced to dance for the King’s masquerade balls every night, we moved until our feet blistered, our toes broke, and all that was left was a pile of limbs.

I had seen them. Shattered limbs. Bodies. Stacked. Dancers piled high once we fractured and could no longer move. Some trolls had skin as bronze as mine, almost human save for its unearthly glow, but it didn’t matter. We all spilled the same black blood in the end.

We didn’t speak to each other. Didn’t acknowledge any love or friendship to give King Mathieu reason to notice us.

Especially not tonight.

Filed: PW Entries

  • I love this! Please query me and upload the full manuscript here: QueryMe.online/devinequeries/PitchWars

  • Quressa Robinson says:

    I’m excited to read more! I may not be the only agent here at Nelson Literary Agency who wants to read your amazing work! So, please send just one email to query@nelsonagency.com with PITCH WARS UPLOAD in the subject line. We will reply with our upload instructions, and then all the interested NLA agents will read and consider your manuscript. Thank you!”

  • Amelia Appel says:

    Hi Alexandria! Your descriptions are astounding – I must see this! Please send a query letter, full synopsis, and attached full manuscript to amelia@triadaus.com, and please include “Pitch Wars” in the subject line. Thanks so much – I look forward to reading!

  • Hi Alexandria,
    Azea’s world is vivid,and I would like to read about her journey. Please send a query letter and the first three chapters of your story to ellamarie@belcastroagency.com. Add Pitch Wars to the subject line. Thanks.
    Ella Marie Shupe
    Belcastro Agency

  • Alexandria, I love this concept! Please send the first 50 pages as a Word doc or PDF attachment to melissa@rpcontent.com. Please also include your query letter in the body of the email, and Pitch Wars in the subject line.

    I look forward to reading!


    Melissa Nasson
    Rubin Pfeffer Content

  • Christa Heschke says:

    Wow, your opening really grabbed me! I’d be interested to see more. Please send a query, first 50 pages and synopsis to chquery@mcintoshandotis.com. Look forward to reading!
    -Christa Heschke, McIntosh & Otis

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