Have questions about submitting to Pitch Wars or just want to know what it is? Start here!

Blog

PW #205: Middle Grade Mystery: THE ORDER OF BLACK HOLLOW LANE

Thursday, 3 November 2016  |  Posted by Heather Cashman

Manuscript Status: Finished

Mentor Name: Julie C. Dao
Mentee Name: Julia Nobel
Title: THE ORDER OF BLACK HOLLOW LANE
Category/Genre: Middle Grade Mystery
Word Count: 56,000 words

Pitch:

When her mom dumps her at boarding school, Ginny figures things can’t get much worse. Then a secret society tries to steal her only link to her missing father: a box of strange medallions. Finding out why might unveil painful secrets…and make her their next target.

Excerpt:

There were certain things Ginny’s mother didn’t need to know—like whether she’d clipped her toenails—but the box in Ginny’s nightstand was not one of them. That was why her fingers twitched when her mother came into her room.

“Are you ready, dear? The press will be here in a few—” Her mother gasped.

Ginny held her breath. She had put the box away, right? If her mom saw it, if she found out….

Suddenly her mother’s eyes filled with tears. “Oh, Ginny, that dress looks beautiful.”

Ginny breathed out and picked at the crunchy taffeta. She had to put the box out of her mind. She needed to focus today.

“It really seems to fit you like a glove. Don’t you just love these polka dots?”

It looked like the dress had come down with the measles. The sleeves puffed out like pink toadstools, and apparently ‘like a glove’ meant barely being able to walk.

“You’re the perfect image of my daughter. Well, almost.” Her eyes lingered on Ginny’s forehead. She picked up a monstrously large hat and wrenched it over the bandage covering Ginny’s three fresh stitches. “Good thing I bought this sweet chapeau. Why you insisted on playing that soccer game is beyond me. You knew we had a major event today.”

“I can’t just skip a match, Mom.” Ginny looked down. What was she supposed to say? Sorry I’m a good soccer player, Mom. I’ll try to suck more, that way I won’t get onto the good teams.

Filed: Pitch Wars

8 Comments
Leave a reply

Disclaimer:

We’d love your comments but ask that you please keep it polite. Although your views are definitely your own, we do not condone harassment or bullying and don’t want to see it here. We reserve the right to delete any comments for any reason, including being abusive, profane or off topic.

IMPORTANT!
We're thrilled at the different ways those in our Pitch Wars community are giving back—and we encourage them to do so. However, please keep in mind that Pitch Wars is not affiliated with any of these various contests, promotions, etc., including those of our mentors and mentees. Promoting any such opportunities via our social media channels doesn't imply endorsement or affiliation. We encourage you to do your research before participating.

Pitch Wars takes a stand. ANTI-BULLYING. Click here to review our policy


Check out our 2018 list of Participating Agents

Blog Archives

Blog Categories