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PW #125: Adult Romantic Comedy: EAT YOUR HEART OUT, TOR MACKELROY

Tuesday, 31 October 2017  |  Posted by Brenda Drake

Manuscript Status: 2 weeks delivery

Mentor Name: Kelly Siskind & J.R. Yates

Mentee Name: Julia Miller


Category: Adult

Genre: Romantic Comedy

Word Count: 77,000 words


There are three things Samantha can’t resist: cheesecake, the thrill of pursuing a hot lead, and her Editor-in-Chief/ex-boyfriend, Tor Mackelroy. When charity scholarship funds go missing, Tor lures Sam back for one last byline. Soon the couple’s old flame blazes into wildfire. But their happily-ever-after hangs in the balance when Tor’s dad becomes the prime suspect. THE HATING GAME meets the 1940’s film HIS GIRL FRIDAY.


It started with the postcards.

According to my imaginary manual on break-up etiquette, it was standard for the guilty party to text something offensive to the betrayed and end up blocked for good. It made for a nice clean break.

My friend Rachel’s ex had shown up at our apartment so she could slam the door in his face. So satisfying. Considerate, really.

In my case, I’d have liked a final blowout phone argument, during which I said my piece and hit End like a cheap mic drop. That would have been proper procedure.

But Tor Mackelroy didn’t play by the rules.

Of course not. He had to be different.

So after a month, he started with the postcards. None of them came with apologies and he didn’t bother denying his cheating ways. That would have been too easy. Instead he’d Photoshopped pictures of our turtle traveling around the world, printed them on postcards, and sent them by snail mail.

Mr. Davis was the collateral damage in this war.

Yes, it was true. My turtle, Mr. Davis, was still living with my ex. In his office. Not even a proper home-home! I never forgave myself for leaving him there.

Tor’s shoddy graphic design skills had sent Mr. Davis to the Great Pyramid, Machu Picchu and Roseanna’s seafood restaurant on the Oregon coast. The poor guy looked miserable the entire time.

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